Making magic is hands-down my favorite part of being a mama. Seeing the kids light up in wonder keeps me going on the hard days. The tooth fairy, Santa, and Easter Bunny are all solid winners to me. I fully admit to researching handwriting fonts for separate imaginary characters in my very limited free time. That being said, I was not gung-ho about becoming an Elf on the Shelf mom at first. I liked my Christmas magic less constant: waking up to a decorated house the day after Thanksgiving, seeing the twinkle of lights while eating sugar cookies, and getting a visit from the big, jolly guy Christmas Eve were enough for me.
When my son first asked why we didn’t have an elf like his little friends a few years ago, I panicked. I straight-up lied to my kiddo that day and told him our elf was probably just helping Santa and would be a couple days late. In reality, I was giving myself a few days to figure out my game plan. There wasn’t room in the budget for an over-priced doll, much less all the elaborate set-ups and accessories splashed on social media. I knew I couldn’t handle both making and cleaning up huge messes just for entertainment. I wasn’t comfortable teaching my toddler that someone was always watching him, or explaining why an elf for Santa could demand good behavior while also breaking every household rule we had. I was going to have to drastically change the standard Elf on the Shelf routine to work for me & my family.
I searched facebook marketplace and ended up grabbing a used elf for ten bucks, no tattling book included, which was A-OK with me. Our elf’s name is Jingle, and he’s not your regular elf. He mainly bops around from place to place, occasionally bringing a small treat, activity, or poem. He doesn’t tell on our kids, or stay still after bad behavior. He’s purely around for fun. I keep a tote of laminated poems and prompts hidden away for eleven months of the year and add occasional goodwill finds to it. My kids still love it. Every morning it’s a race to see who can spot Jingle first. All the joy is there, even without saran-wrapped ice-rink sinks and large, sticky messes. Moving him to a new spot takes less than a minute every night, and is well worth their excitement. Even my bigger set-ups – small compared to others but big in our household – take less than five minutes.
Instead of being a tradition that I dread, I found a way to make it something that adds to both the kiddos and my holiday joy. Your family’s magic doesn’t have to match everyone else’s.
Disclaimer/Reality Check: Someone, somewhere will want to get after me for “lying to my kids” etc. etc. If my kids are mad that I tried to make magic for them when they are older, I will do whatever is required to repair that. For now, I’m going to keep making joy wherever and whenever I can. For the next few weeks this column will be on parenting during the holidays – I might not do it like everyone else, but that’s ok. Most importantly, I don’t ever want this column to make another mama think she’s not doing enough. If you’re reading this, I want you to know that you are, you’re doing great, keep it up. Sing it with me: no-one is doing it allllll!
