Toddler hair is a fickle thing. A tiny kiddo waking up with a messy bed-head is adorable, yet awful for the parent that’ll be untangling it. Two of my three children are girls with stick-straight, ultra-fine hair – perfect for tangling. We’re on year four of battling with brushes, and here’s what I’ve learned thus far.
Keep only what you need. I’m not skilled enough to do fancy styles with multiple tiny sections and my fingers snap those tiny elastics more often than not. I always, always reach for the larger, fabric type bands or a bow so that’s all we have. Having only what we use in their hair drawer means I can reach in without looking to grab what I need.
Find the right tool for the job. I’m not saying you need every new gadget out there or every over-hyped influencer product that’s being shoved down your throat. I’m saying sometimes it’s worth spending a bit more time and money to find the right tool for your needs. We’ve tried wide-tooth combs, the wet brush, the tangle teezer, a boar bristle brush, and the unbrush. The unbrush has worked best for us, but another might work best for your kids.
Make a menu. Every morning when doing my girls hair we would argue about what style they want done. I am not girly, they are. I don’t always understand what they’re requesting; there is nothing more frustrating than doing an entire hairstyle only to hear “not THAT one, Mama!”. One morning I sat down, drew out the most requested hair styles and my oldest girl named them with me. After framing, I hung it in the bathroom for easy reference.
Detangle right after conditioning. I hesitate to include this, because I am not a hair expert. I’ve noticed it’s easiest to detangle my girls hair when they are straight out of the shower, with freshly washed & deep conditioned hair. You know your own kids’ hair types, you make the call on when to detangle.
Try to keep it fun. Try being the most important word here. I’ve noticed that my kids really feed off my mood. If I act like it’s going to be a big battle, it will be right off the bat. I try to set the mood by playing sing-along music and occasionally using the brush as a microphone. I’ll pretend to get distracted by doing my own hair or make silly faces at them in the mirror. If there’s still steam on the mirror, I encourage them to draw while I detangle. I know it’s hard, I know internally you’re trying to get though it as fast as possible, but taking the time to make it enjoyable is worth it.
Even with all these tips, somedays my girls’ hair will just be a mess. They’ll pull out their hair bands on the way to wherever we’re going, or the car seat will rub their freshly brushed hair into new tangles. By nighttime – or more truthfully, by mid-morning – it looks like I never brushed it at all. That’s ok, it happens, and every other mama that’s worth knowing won’t mind. You’re doing great, keep your chin up.
Disclaimer/Reality Check: There are still epic hair battles in my home – screaming, crying, the works; no-one’s house is perfect and pleasant all the time. Neighbors, if you’re reading this, I occasionally yell “I HAVE to get the knots out!” for your benefit alone. The girls know what I’m doing, I know why they’re screaming, but I want you to know they are not being murdered. This column will be about motherhood, parenting, and homemaking for the most part. Sometimes it’ll have tips to keep the house tidy or survive the over stimulation, other times it might be independent play activities or ramblings on the perfect amount of Easter basket filler. Most importantly, I don’t ever want this column to make another mama think she’s not doing enough. If you’re reading this, I want you to know that you are, you’re doing great, keep it up. Sing it with me: no-one is doing it allllll!
About Mackayla
Mackayla Turley is a married stay-at-home mom of three young kids in Pahrump, Nevada. She enjoys drinking coffee, reading, baking, and exercise as well as running a local moms group, Pahrump Mother’s Corner. Her friends describe her as a cheerleader, a giver, a minimalist, and an extrovert. She can be reached at pahrumpmotherscorner@runbox.com.
